Lessons from Aslan

Last week was rough. It wasn't that lots of stuff when bad; it was that most things didn't go smoothly. There were several big stresses like fevers, sleepless nights, and a broken down car to deal with. There were millions of little things like lost shoes, misplaced sunglasses, and endless whines. By Thursday, I just wanted life to be easy. I didn't want to have to work so hard.

Lucy told Aslan, "I thought you'd come roaring in and fright all the enemies away... And now everything is going to be horrid." That is exactly how I felt. I just wanted God to come in and make everything right - me, the boys, the car, the weather, everything! But he didn't so it was all going to be horrid.

But in the middle of my pity party, Aslan came back, walking beside a boy feeling like the most unfortunate boy in the world. He was riding a stupid horse through fog after crossing a desert and being chased by lions. And when the boy wonders, "Who are you?" Aslan answers,

"Myself," said the Voice, very deep and low so that the earth shook: and again, "Myself," loud and clear and gay: and then the third time "Myself," whispered so softly you could hardly hear it, and yet it seemed to come from all round you as if the leaves rustled with it."

And God revealed himself to me. He showed me that all along the way, he was there. He was with me as the boys whined, as I was awake through the night, and as the car wouldn't shift in the middle of an intersection. He was not there to make all my trouble disappear, but he was there to help me walk through those troubles. And I could hear him saying, like Aslan, "I do not call you unfortunate," and "Now you are a lioness and all of Narnia will be renewed."

Yes, God does provide in big and amazing ways. More often, he doesn't. But that doesn't mean we are alone walking in the fog or laying sleepless in the night. He is there with us even when we can't see or feel him. Often when he seems some times an "optical what-do-you-call-it" it is more because we have chosen not to see him rather than him being invisible. And he will always reveal himself to seekers... but that is another story.

A new week has started. It has been just as crazy as last week. Just as many things have not gone smoothly, but this week I am aware of God's nearness. And that has made all the difference.

Earth and Water

I am Earth.

Earth doesn't change easily. Cataclysms and tragedies may alter the face of earth rapidly, and those fault lines can always be found if you dig in the right places. But usually it is the daily wear and tear, the daily life, the daily relationship with the other elements that slowly changes earth. The changes may not be obvious from day to day, but show themselves over time.

He is Water.

Water is strong, not through its inflexibility, but through its patience and persistence. Its surface may seem calm, but be covering many currents. It usually follows its course, but wears down the sides and changes the course over time. Water is always changing, but always the same.

Water feeds the earth, nourishing it, so earth in turn can nourish others. Water wears down and changes the face of earth, and though it is sometimes the cause of natural disasters, it also brings healing and new life after as earth heals. Earth provides a home for water, a place where it can run smoothly. Sometimes earth causes underwater turbulence, but water smoothes out the bumps and takes earth wherever it goes. They work together to bring life, comfort, and rest to all who will sit beside the river bed. Without each other, life would be a desert or a flood.

I am Earth. He is Water.

IN WHICH My Baby Turns Two

Last Monday, Malcolm turned 2. I thought back to my post about TWO (when Eamon was two and Malcolm was 2 months). So much has happened since then!

The other day, Malcolm bumped himself and was crying. I cuddled him and said, "Poor Baby;" he stopped crying and replied, "Not Baby, little boy." I said, "Oh! Aw, poor little boy." And he pretended to cry some more to get more cuddles.

That's my little boy! We haven't had his 2 year check up yet, but he is a few inches shorter and a few pounds lighter than Eamon. He eats just about as much and is just as picky, but about different things. Eamon is my barbecue boy; Malcolm prefers ranch. We get Eamon to eat by singing to him; we get Malcolm to eat by pretending to steal his food. Eamon is reactionary; Malcolm is the instigator. For Eamon, life is a battle to fight or a quest to conquer; for Malcolm, life is a game to play and joke to laugh at. Together, they are best buddies and worst enemies.

On his own, he likes to play cars and trucks. He likes playing the piano. He enjoys books, though he usually prefers to have them read to him, rather than just looking at them by himself. He sings and dances and tries to make Mommy shout or laugh. He gets jealous when his brother is getting Mommy cuddles, but is very much "not a baby" anymore.

He is beginning to talk quite a bit. In fact, I often have to remind myself that he is just two and though we encourage him to use words to tell us what is wrong, I can't expect him to be able to explain himself very well yet. His biggest fits happen when he thinks I don't understand what he wants, either because I really don't understand or because I won't let him do or have what he wants. He is also beginning to repeat everything we say. I was correcting Eamon and said, "No, Honey." Malcolm, who was doing something else, repeated, "No, Honey." Eamon turned on him and said, "You're not my Mother!" Last night, he said parts of our repeated prayers and sang parts of the Gloria. And today in church, the pastor heard him repeat several of the words in the Bible readings. I don't know how much he knows what all the words mean, but he is working on his pronunciation.

I love all of this little boy, but perhaps my favorite thing about him is the way he is full of smiles and tends to know how to make other people smile too.