10 months!

Summer always goes fast, but it seems that this month has flown by faster than usual. And though it seems like I have been busier than ever, it also seems like I get less done! Sometimes it seems that I have nothing to show for what I do all day, but Eamon is a month older, he is healthy and strong and happy (usually) so I guess that is something.

Sleeping: The arrival of another tooth and crazy napping schedules have completely thrown off any sleep routine that we had. Some nights he sleeps great. Others we all get headaches because we haven't slept more than two hours together or we have woken up at 4am with a fussy baby who won't fall back to sleep. Last night was a good night though. I wouldn't mind more of them. But I suppose it is payback for the trouble I gave my parents when I was a baby.

Eating: He is still nursing several times a day, but he loves his Cheerios. Every morning when I pour Cheerios for breakfast, he get excited and nearly jumps out of my arms. Today he tried to get some out of the box. He likes squash and fruit of all types but especially bananas. He doesn't like grown-up food very much yet. We give him bits but he usually gags or spits it out. We'll keep working on it, but until he gets used to more textures, he has his baby food and Cheerios and mommy.

Playing: He gets into everything. He prefers to explore rather than just play. And he prefers things that aren't toys, like the trunk, the piano, the stereo, the cupboards, etc. He loves books, but still can't turn pages without ripping or wrinkling them. So his board books are great, and before afternoon nap time, we look at big-boy books. He is beginning to understand that there are other children in this world. He thinks that the way to interact with them is to grab their face or pat their head or pull himself to a stand using them, but he likes people, especially other kids now. He wants to do everything his cousin (a year older) does. It was interesting watching them "play" the other day. Eamon wanted Edmund's toys, until Edmund started playing with Eamon's toys. Neither quite grasp the concept of "together" yet; they want all the attention for themselves. Eamon seems to get confused when I have a different child on my lap.

Development: Eamon pulls himself up on anything he can - the wall, the stereo, the radiator cover, me, the bench. This has caused several falls, but none too serious. He has discovered the stairs and will climb over halfway if we let him. Then he turns to whoever is following him and asks to be picked up. We now keep a gate up. Last night he decided to climb the step ladder too. He was quite please with himself perched on top of the ladder. I keep him pretty close to me all day long, so he doesn't do anything without me right there, but I think it is good for him to explore and learn about his world and what he is able (and not able) to do. And I don't think it is good for him to hear "No, you can't do that," all day long. It means I have to be extra vigilant and get interrupted very often, but I think it is worth it.

Other things: He has moved up to size 3 diapers and is wearing 6-9 month clothes. He has a few smaller and a few larger that he wears too, but that is the approximate size he is. He doesn't seem to mind being hot when we cuddle, but he doesn't like the sun shining on him in the car. He loves being outside though. He is getting rather dextrous with his little fingers. The other day he picked out a single pin from my pin box while I was sewing. He also crawled over the fabric and pricked his little belly. Perhaps I am a terrible mommy for letting him get hurt, but I can't protect him from every injury that he will ever encounter, and I would rather him learn how to handle hurt than keep him from ever getting hurt, especially when the hurts come as a result of his actions.

I worry sometimes that we are letting him become a willful or disobedient boy, but at the same time I don't know that he understands actions and consequences very clearly yet. So perhaps it is inconsistent to let him get pricked by pins for crawling over something I said "No" to, but not spanking him for climbing the steps. But at the same time, I never let him near the steps by himself, and he will learn to use them before he learns to sew. That where this whole parenting thing get really complicated. Fortunately, God does not call us to be perfect parents, only loving parents, and love covers a multitude of wrongs.

The Vacuum Monster

Once upon a time, there was a brave knight in training. (I know this is technically called a squire, but "squire" didn't sound right for the story.) He had not faced many foes yet, so his bravery was still untested. But he believed himself to be brave, and those who knew him best also knew there lay a seed of true courage in his heart.

One day, into this brave young knights quiet existence there burst an orange vacuum monster. At first, the knight was unsure of what to do. He did not know whether it was a friend or enemy, or if it could be used for good, or only for evil. He watched its progress across the floor from a safe distance. Slowly he realized that it was under his father's control, but it was still so loud! He watched and clung to the safest thing he knew. He was not sure if he wanted to be brave after all.

But the vacuum monster was leaving the room! What would it do in other lands? Now that it was further off, it wasn't so loud either. He must find out what would happen. He chased the monster, but as he neared it, slowed and began sneaking up to it. With one hand clinging to his mother, he touched the monster. Vibrations ran through his fingers and he pulled away. The monster also pulled away, as the young knight's father left the room.

Now the brave young knight was sure that the vacuum monster would not hurt him. He followed it though the house, touching it delicately every now and again. When it went upstairs, he tried climbing the stairs mountain, even though he didn't like the feel of the carpet grass under his hands. He had to keep an eye on that monster.

By the time the monster went back into its cave, the brave young knight was no longer afraid of it. In fact, he almost liked it. It was exciting and different and just a tiny bit scary because he never knew when it might come after him.

Baby Eamon's Camp Adventure

While Lady Mommy spoke with the other Ladies of the Court, Aunty Lady Bug... Lady Aunty Bug took Baby Eamon on an adventure. Lady Mommy doesn't know all that they did, but Baby Eamon loved it. He was in his backpack most of the time and as they walked through the woods, he laughed and yelled and flapped his arms. They built a stone pathway with some Ladies in Waiting and, Eamon charmed everyone who saw him.

When Lady Mommy finally found him, Baby Eamon didn't want to go back inside, but he did want Lady Mommy to hold him. She helped finish the stone pathway and then gathered things up for lunch. But poor Baby Eamon. He was so tired, he fell asleep before he was done eating.

I don't know if Lady Aunty Bug taught him this, but ever since that adventure, whenever he gets in the backpack, he grabs a hold of the bar, and shakes and shakes himself (and the backpack and the person carrying the backpack), gigging like a little crazy. He also does this to his crib, his play place, and his highchair. Silly Baby Eamon!

Camper Discipline

Last Thursday I did a session for Girls' Orientation on Camper Discipline. They keep asking me to come back, but each year I realize I know less and less. However, what I do know, I know better. This year's presentation not only was about Camper Discipline, but really touched on a lot of things I have been thinking about, so I thought I would put some excerpts here.

Camper Discipline. Right. Well. “Nothing works. It’s true. I don’t like it, but it’s true. Nothing works. At least in ministry and missions (which are one and the same), there is no magic formula, no methodological messiah, no fool-proof program, no golden tablet or holy grail. No genius is going to come along and hand us the solution in a book or seminar.” (http://danbouchelle.blogspot.com/2012/06/inconvenient-truth-no-1-nothing-works.html) 

I would love to tell you that if you just follow these few steps, your campers would not give you any problems. It would be nice if I could tell you the right things to say so that they would have a great time, or that they would all accept Jesus into their hearts by the end of the week. But unfortunately, I can’t. Nothing like that works.

You may ask, if nothing works then what is the point of me being here and talking about camper discipline? Because I am here to remind you that while no-thing works, God does. God did not send a five-point method or a ten-step program; he sent his Son. And that is the heart of camper discipline. So I will not be able to give you a set of things to follow for perfect campers, but I will remind you about the heart the issue, and hopefully give you a few practical applications of that.

God works. God is three persons, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, and still perfectly unified. There is love and communion between the three persons – there is a relationship within the God-head. And that relationship is extended to us. John 17:20-21 says “My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you.” Jesus prays that we will be just as unified with Him as He is with Himself! Jesus wants a relationship with us. But there was a problem, called sin. Sin separated us from God; in fact, we chose to be separated from God. We preferred things to relationship. We try to find satisfaction in belonging, purpose because of what we do, and hope in what we can get. And often we are like the Pharisees who set-up and follow their own laws. But none of that gets us closer to God. So God sent Jesus, and He came so He could have that relationship with us. His perfect life, death, and resurrection allow us to be connected with God, through repentance and faith. The heart of the Gospel is relationship...

 What does this all have to do with camper discipline? At the heart of discipline is relationship – not only your relationship with the camper, but also your relationship with God and your camper’s relationship with God. When we keep this in mind, bad behavior isn’t about offending us or even breaking the rules. It is a breach of relationship, a tear in the soul making it unable to be complete or satisfied, creating tension and pain that sometimes remains even after the breach is healed. Our response can then be one of compassion rather than frustration or impatience. It allows us to see ourselves as peacemakers rather than judges. It lets us not dread encounters, even though they may sadden us....

But remember, nothing works. God works. And by his power and through his grace, we can work too.

Although I don't have to deal with campers, I do have to deal with people. It was good to remember that making things work out perfectly isn't my job. My job is to build relationships where Jesus can be seen. Sometimes that means confronting issues, sometimes it means overlooking offenses, and sometimes that means loving and loving and loving, even when it is hard.

I am so often confronted by my own inability to do this, but it is comforting to know that God is at work, in me, and in all the people I have relationships with. I know the Holy Spirit is at work, and His power is best seen in my weakness.

Tidbits

~ Adding a packet of french onion dip mix and a cup of water to a crock-pot roast makes deliciousness, especially if you used the broth to make gravy.

~ Thinking too much can lead to thoughts that really aren't worth thinking and have no relation to anything being previously thought. However, thinking while falling asleep can lead to very profitable revelations, until you wake up and realize that rather than thinking about putting the baby to bed you are thinking about putting cake on a plate.

~ Drinking water is good. I prefer water that is cool, not cold, but it is difficult to get it to that perfect temperature before it is warm. It is impossible to do this with water bottles. Therefore I usually drink warm water.

~ Writing one email makes me think of all the other emails I would like to write, but can't because I have a child crawling over me. It also makes me wonder what my excuse for not writing them was before I had a child crawling over me. I'm sure it was a good excuse, but I can't remember what it was.

~ Taking pictures can get annoying to your subject. It is very important to stop taking pictures when the subject begins to get tired of it, otherwise everyone ends up annoyed.

~ Learning about dialects is very interesting. Wikipedia is full of interesting information.

~ Soccer news is boring when all there is to read about is who is getting transferred where and speculations of who will leave and who will come and such. Not having a game to watch on the weekend was a little weird.

~ Shakespeare was a genius. But it is nice to know that not everything he wrote was of equal quality.

~ Motivating people to do something inconvenient and maybe even uncomfortable is a daunting and tiring task, especially when you cannot promise any immediate benefit. Yet this is the job of parents and teachers. (Other people have to do this too, but I cannot list them all, even if I could think of them.)

~ Procrastination is my friend, until it is my enemy. This is another way of saying that I had a pile of dishes that I finally took the time to wash. It took far too long because I had waited so long.

~ I am going to Camp this week. I am rather excited. And a little nervous, but more on that after the fact.

Training for Life

There are so many things that we need to teach our children, but I was thinking the other day how nice it is that there are so many things we don't need to teach them. Things like how to read or how to play an instrument don't come naturally, but can be fostered by relationship and training, so they come more naturally. Things like obedience and self-sacrifice are life-long lessons. And learning to eat or sleep and such are matters of helping them know when to do it, not knowing how to do it.

But I was thinking the other day as I fed Eamon his Cheerios, "I am so glad I don't need to teach him how to chew." That led me to think about all the things children learn to do without any training. They know how to play and explore and pretend. Such things can be encouraged so they do it better as they get older, but children learn how to do it on their own. They can sing and communicate - it might not make sense, and they might not be able to do it well, but the striving for communication both in words and in song amazes me. They know there is something there that they want to be part of; we just teach them the tools. And aren't you glad that we don't really need to teach them how to sleep or poop or cry when they are hurt? Those vital things come naturally, and even if they aren't always pleasant to deal with, it would be so difficult to teach them how to do it. Think about it, "OK, baby, when I step on your hand, you should start crying because it hurts. Yes, that sensation you feel, that is called pain. When we feel pain, we cry..."

The task of parenting can sometimes feel overwhelming. But thinking about this just made my job a little less daunting. He will learn basic life skills. I get to teach him all the things that make life not just about survival.